i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
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