hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
there was a trapeze. enough said
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
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