Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
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