we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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