i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
She needs sedatives and a leash
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Randomize
