I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
