didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Randomize
