and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
Randomize
