.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Randomize