words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
Randomize