I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
Randomize
