That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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