Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
Is it because I queefed?
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
