Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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