You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Your penis caused this!
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
Randomize
