Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
Fuck appropriateness.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
