in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
