I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
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