you would pick up someone in the library
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
