i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
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