NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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