You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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