I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
Randomize