if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Randomize
