what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
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