Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Randomize