yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
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