She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
