dear santa what can i do with your candy cane?
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Randomize
