I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
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