Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Randomize