your thong is hanging out like whoa
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
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