He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Randomize
