I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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