He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
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