I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Randomize
