I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
