I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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