Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
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