Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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