you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize