how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
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