I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Randomize
