I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
Randomize