I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
Randomize