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• (650): View more from California

  Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah

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• (508): View more from Massachusetts

  hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.

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• (312): View more from Illinois

  I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr

  (269): View more from Michigan

  Wat???

  (312): View more from Illinois

  U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender

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• (818): View more from California

  I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff

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• 

  27 Unforgettable Hookup Texts

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (402): View more from Nebraska

  i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  ...welcome to nebraska

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• (203): View more from Connecticut

  I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?

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• (419): View more from Ohio

  Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.

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• (831): View more from California

  It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics

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• (361): View more from Texas

  After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.

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• 

  19 Groupies Confess What It’s Really Like To Hook Up With Famous Rockstars

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (504): View more from Louisiana

  But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...

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• (734): View more from Michigan

  She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.

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• (515): View more from Iowa

  We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.

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• (802): View more from Vermont

  Omg that was my second thought of the morning.

  (802): View more from Vermont

  First was that we had pop tarts.

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• (336): View more from North Carolina

  Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed

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• (818): View more from California

  Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time

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