You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I'm lost and stupid without you.
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
Randomize
