my grandpa was trying to put butter into the pepsi and i'm like "grandpa what are you doing" and he looks down and goes "well i guess that wouldn't taste good anyway"
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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