By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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