he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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