he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
