The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
Non-Jews are for practice
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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