Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
so let's talk penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
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