I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
